El Camino: The A.F.L.E.
Saturday, March 30, 2024 - Lyon, France,
It hasn’t even been a week since arriving. I haven’t even started walking yet, and yet, I think I have experienced all the emotions.
From giddy, happy, wow, lonely, insecure, calm, nervous, anxious, terrified, stressed, tears, confused, acceptance, and “it is what it is” It’s an AFLE. But a positive AFLE. Now those of you who do not know what an AFLE is let me break it down for you:
A = Another
F = Freaking or F…. F’ing (Depending on how intense the LE is…)
L = Learning
E = Experience
In truth I have to give credit to my father‘s last wife. Let’s call her D. She and I did not have a good relationship. When it was Bad, it was Awful BUT when it was Good, it was Great. The funny thing is D was planning on walking part of the Camino with me 10 years ago. (Before MS reared its ugly head. Another AFLE). It does amaze me how certain relationships can go from a 10 to a 1 so quickly. It is sad that we all get caught up in our egos. The last time I saw D, 8 or 9 years ago, we were at a 5. She is part of one of my stones that I carry.
These stones represent pilgrims' burdens that have weighed them down: grief, resentment, anger, etc. The goal is to think about these burdens, move through them while walking, and then release them.
The Stones I Carry
Somewhere at the end of The Camino there is a very tall iron cross that stands in the middle of a small hill of stones. Over the countless years that people have been walking The Camino, they have carried a stone or stones in their backpacks. These stones represent pilgrims' burdens that have weighed them down: grief, resentment, anger, etc. The goal is to think about these burdens, move through them while walking, and then release them. When they reach the cross on the trail they know it is time to let go. To release these burdens that weighed them down for so long. There are thousands upon thousands of stones that create this small hill. D is part of what I call my resentment stone. It encompasses many resentments I have gathered over the years - from people to experiences.
I hope to truly be able to let them all go. I know I will feel so much lighter. I hope that D has been able to truly let go of her resentments that she gathered while being a part of our family. I hope that she has found true happiness.
